When I see my naughty 8-year-old son crying over his shenanigans, lost toy or even a basic scolding, I consciously try to make him stop his obvious tantrums by not saying that ‘boys don’t cry’ or asking him questions like ‘are u a girl’. I do not want him to inculcate the idea of gender difference in his tender mind merely based on physical habits. I want him instead to build his strong emotional self. I don’t want him to be emotional weak (although there is nothing negative in being one too), but I don’t want him to compare himself by thinking that if there comes a moment in his life when he feels emotional or psychologically weak, then he is acting like another gender, in turn considering the particular gender to be weak in any form.
The moment a child is born, they get engulfed under the blanket of gender specifications resulting in unconscious stereotypes and difference in their individual roles. Right from the colour of their walls of nurseries to their colour and kind of toys they use, each aspect focuses on separating the genders. Their clothes, patterns, and even their names show the gender boundary they belong to! It goes to the extent where gender demarcation becomes the flag-bearer of respective cultures that need to be taken care of and protect to a greater degree. These most of the times carry on but the problem arise when these demarcations between genders become a subject of inequality resulting in serious issues of suppression of a particular gender by the other. The suppressive instincts in a way give rise to various obvious disparities kike gender stereotyping. These stereotypes get associated with respective genders and end up widening the gap of their recognition as an independent entity. This is where ideas of logic and emotions seep in that further divide the existing gaps between various genders whether male, female, trans or LGBTQ communities! They further have the capacity to hamper personal, professional, social, and emotional growth of each of them as individuals and as a specific community.
The stereotypes when emerge revolve around a major aspect of logic as well as emotions. In fact, Essentialists may believe that a particular gender has greater ability to project logic, analytical skills than the others who may be more emotional, nurturing, or emotional as part of their gender identification. These attributes end up becoming so integral to their identity that it becomes very difficult to break free and those who can rise above it are considered lucky few! These stereotypes have a great impact on the public and private lifestyle of these respective genders. They in their private outlook consider one gender to be below the other or weaker than themselves and categorise them to fall into the self-built category of nurturers, dependents, soft targets. However, in the public angle they make the other fall into the pit of limited physical capability having lesser monetary value. These need to be guarded by the other and need to be surrounded by rules and boundaries made for their so-called physical, emotional, and financial protection. Perhaps they have not been able to come out of the thought process that believes in the relevance and grave importance needed to develop and manage the already existing demarcations between the existing and emerging genders so that the ever-prevailing natural order can be preserved!
Perhaps when quotes like “Frailty, thy name is Woman!” became popular those were the times when the acceptance towards acceptance of breaking free was not acceptable and the idea of keeping the order and methos was so deeply engraved that gender demarcations were prevalent and accepted quite naturally. With the change in times and views the nature of understanding that there is a thin line between the difference in behavioural pattern in various genders came further out in open. The need of the hour is to understand, accept and enhance the change. There is great need to understand that in these times of physical and emotional turmoil, where each day, perhaps each moment people are realising their different identities; the concept of logic and rationality have long ago transcended the boundaries of gender disparities! To accept the similarities and differences between ‘him’, ‘her’, ‘them’, we need to absorb their need to coexist, and thrive in harmony and self-realisation. It needs to be clearly written and understood that difference in physical appearance and biological individualist capabilities must not be the deciding factors of create the boundaries between rationality and emotionality of various genders in and out of question.
Anyone can be fickle, imperfect, weak or frail. We are all humans. We all have our weak moments. It is necessary to not to generalise. We can very well share our rationality, emotions, logics among each other for there is so much of space for us all to co-exist. The idea of acceptability comes naturally to all and needs to have full freedom to have individuality along with the ability to borrow from each other for the mergence of stereotypes has the capability and power to bring a societal coherence and growth of mental capacity to accept all that exists!